By skyforbes 
When a family member or a loved one goes to jail, especially in an unexpected way or for unexpected reasons, a person’s world comes crashing down.
Incarceration makes a great impact not only in the life of the imprisoned individual but also in the lives of the family members left behind. It involves uncertainty, fear, and guilt, and causes stress in both parties as they struggle to adjust to the reality they’re facing.
Coping with such circumstances can be challenging. Staying afloat and getting through the hardships might seem impossible to do. However, with time, it is doable.
Understanding the situation
Understanding what’s happening, no matter how painful or overwhelming it is, is the first step you can take towards acceptance. It’s never easy, and it requires a lot of adjustments. But trying to have a clear grasp on what lies ahead for you and an imprisoned loved one can help you plan your next steps more rationally.
Here are a few more things you can do when a loved one goes to prison:
1. Live your life one day at a time.
There are moments when you would want to break down and give up. It’s hard to get used to a loved one’s absence in your day-to-day life, so it’s completely understandable for you to get overwhelmed.
But keeping your thoughts directed towards the sense of loss and emptiness you’re feeling will not help you move forward to the more important matters you need to take care of. Take things slowly, if you must. But never let yourself remain stagnant.
2. Keep the family united and be each other’s support system.
In tough times, you need your family to stay strong and be there for one another. A loved one’s incarceration is a traumatic event, and you need someone to lean on – especially in the early stages of grief.
Constant communication is essential to keep family relationships resilient and tight-knit. Talk and listen to each other. Figure things out together. There’s a certain kind of comfort that only a family can provide.
3. Explain the situation carefully to young children in the family.
Kids tend to raise too many questions when a family member’s constant presence is suddenly lost. Tell them the truth in a way they would understand why a loved one needs to be away for some time.
It will only frustrate them if you keep making excuses that don’t add up in the long run. Be patient and try to accommodate all their queries, but make sure you answer them in an age-appropriate manner.
4. Educate yourself on the legal system.
It’s useful to understand the legal justice system and the processes that come with it. You might not work in the field of law, but it doesn’t hurt to know what goes on in legal proceedings.
This can also help you better comprehend an incarcerated loved one’s legal rights and where they stand in terms of the charges and sentence against them. Many people are surprised to learn that the prison system is quite different from what they see in the movies.
5. Stay in contact.
Visit an incarcerated loved one whenever possible. Phone calls, when permitted, can work just fine too. Surely, they’re not having the best time behind prison bars, isolated from their family and the rest of the world.
Even for a short while, comfort them with the knowledge that they’re not forgotten. For this, it’s better to be familiar with visiting schedules and what you’re allowed or not allowed to take with you.
6. Take better care of yourself.
Experiencing the stress and anxieties of having a loved one incarcerated can take a toll on your physical, emotional, and mental wellbeing. Don’t set yourself aside. Find ways to take your mind off of your worries from time to time.
Both your mind and body must be in good shape to keep going and be able to provide strength and encouragement to other family members who need you.
7. Join support groups.
There are various support groups in the community that help families or friends of imprisoned individuals deal with the grief and struggles they’re going through. Some of them offer counselling, which is a great way for you to vent your pent-up emotions – sadness, frustration, anger, desperation – and get warranted advice on how to channel them into something more positive.
What to expect in the weeks and months following incarceration?
It is impossible to know exactly what to expect, especially if an incarcerated loved one faces a long-term sentence. The prison system is extensive and follows strict rules and regulations.
There’s no assurance of them getting released and eventually reintegrating into society – but there’s no harm in hoping that things will turn out for the better. Meanwhile, you and your family must be prepared to move forward and deal with the reality of the situation.
Conclusion
A family member’s incarceration can be very difficult to cope with. But when you give your best efforts and surround yourself with the best support systems, it can be easier to come to terms with the situation and learn to live with it.
Also, read: 5 Healthy Strategies to Help You Cope With Past Trauma