Sit with the pain or feeling

Last Updated on January 11, 2025

When I was in my twenties, I attended a seminar on how to deal with addiction. During the seminar, a gentleman in his forties shared his story about his battle with heroin addiction. He spoke candidly about his struggles and the methods he had tried to overcome his dependency. The most effective approach, he said, was learning to sit with the feeling—acknowledging it, locating where it resided in his body, and simply being present with it.

What he meant was not running away from the craving, not suppressing it, and certainly not acting on it. Instead, he advised sitting with the sensation, even if it was just for a few seconds. Those few seconds mattered, he explained, because they represented a moment of triumph—a moment where you chose not to act on the craving or the urge.

Years later, when I decided to quit smoking cigarettes, I used the very same technique. Whenever the craving hit, I would sit with it, allowing myself to fully experience the sensation without giving in. Sometimes I could manage to sit with the craving for five minutes; other times, I pushed myself to hold out for an hour. It wasn’t easy, but over time, I noticed that my willpower began to strengthen.

Little by little, those moments of resistance added up. Each time I sat with the craving, I felt a small victory, and eventually, my determination grew strong enough to quit altogether. As of today, I’ve been smoke-free for 11 days, and I feel a deep sense of accomplishment knowing that I overcame one of the toughest battles of my life using this simple yet powerful technique.