Week in Review: October 31, 2025. · Hi. Children are hungry. Thanks…

· Hi. Children are hungry. Thanks, Obama.

· Senators got beef with JD Vance this week about the Argentinian beef sitch. Know who don’t got any beef at all (or chicken or canned goods)? American children who depend on SNAP benefits that run out tomorrow.

· The New York Times reported this week that the Trump Administration quietly reinstalled the statue of Confederate Albert Pike, who historians believe was a Klan member, much to the delight and praise of Trump supporters. But sure, they’re good people who just want lower gas prices.

· “South Caredddd.” — Donald Trump on Wednesday this week, apparently having a stroke live, while posting on Truth Social. Or a (well-fed) toddler got hold of his phone.

· Wait, did Marjorie Taylor Greene just blast the GOP again for not caring about poor people? This moral alignment stuff is starting to get uncomfortable.

· “Life in New York is tough right now. Candidates who need on-the-job training can’t fix it.” — Andrew Cuomo, the guy who resigned in shame after multiple sexual harassment allegations were levied against him (and people were dying in nursing homes), touting his own experience, while on the job. Sorry, who needs training, again?

· The Pentagon reported this week it has destroyed numerous watercraft they are sure were drug runners (no absolute proof). It’s easy to be right when you just kill everyone on board.

· News outlets are reporting the deal is almost sealed for an epic rematch between Floyd Mayweather and Manny Pacquiao. Rumor has it the negotiating sticking point is whose nursing home will host it.

· According to the Billboard charts, there is a drought in rap music and people are clamoring for new music. This may exclusively explain [quoty fingers] rapper [end quoty fingers] Tom MacDonald’s recent popularity.

· News outlets note this week that the Trump administration greatly reduced asylum seeking numbers from 125,000 during the Biden administration to 7,500, and that the vast majority of them would specifically be white South Africans based upon unspeakable harships there, you know, like having to stand in line with people who don’t own vineyards.

· Donald Trump bragged that he did well on a “very hard” IQ test. It was a dementia screening. Does this mean he failed or passed?

· Americans have been leaving messages in chalk on the sidewalk near Stephen (Pee Wee German) Miller’s home, expressing their dislike for his policies, so he’s selling the home. Wait, how do you define “snowflake,” again?

· The Trump Administration on Wednesday deleted language on the government website that made clear there are years worth of tax dollars to support SNAP benefits (which have always been released during government shutdowns). It specifically deleted the language pertaining to the mandate that in the event of a government shutdown, SNAP benefits would continue. The president is starving children for power. Let that sink all the way in.

· The Washington Post reports that MAGA women are having difficulty finding men who are “good,” or actually “Christian,” or in any way “masculine,” on the Christian dating apps. Ladies, have you tried Grindr?

· This week’s Costco Pallet-Sized Supply of Fuck You goes out to Trump from our own Representative Jasmine Crockett, who just introduced the No Presidential Payouts Act, which prevents the use of tax dollars to pay for the legitimate prosecutions of presidents by the DOJ, on the heels of the President demanding $230MM from taxpayers.

· “Fuck You!” — Los Angeles to the Trump administration, which is not going to let any of its SNAP benefit residents go hungry and is dipping into its reserves to fill the void.

· “Fuck You!” — San Francisco to the Trump administration, which is not going to let any of its SNAP benefit residents go hungry and is dipping into its reserves to fill the void.

· “Fuck you!” — Massachusetts to the Trump administration, filing suit to release emergency funds earmarked for SNAP benefits, even during a shutdown.

· “Fuck You!” — Colorado to the Trump administration, filing suit to release emergency funds earmarked for SNAP benefits, even during a shutdown.

· Hurricane Melissa has left a trail of devastation in the Caribbean. If history is any indication, the US response to aid a largely brown country will be to send a case of paper towels, and make a post on Truth Social about brown people “looting” and white people “successfully foraging” to survive.

· This week, schools in Australia admitted their teachers had accidentally spent a semester educating their students on Augustus Caesar instead of Julius Caesar, and the country has now exempted those kids affected from questions on their standardized proficiency test, relating to Julius. Meanwhile, in America, school kids of similar age are wondering if Augustus Caesar is the one that comes with chicken.

· Rosie O’Donnell asked for prayers this week for her 28-year-old daughter, whose mental health and addiction challenges have landed her in jail, and learned there’s no hate quite like Christian love.

· Dictionary.com has chosen “6–7” as the word of the year. 67 is a colloquial term used by GenAlpha that appears to be connected to the song “Doot Doot” by Skrilla. It could mean something long or “tall” (as in 6’7”), or something being “meh,” or nothing at all, but it definitely means these rugrats are annoying the hell out of everyone over 21 with this shit.

· NASCAR has a new DEI program, in spite of the current political climate, and is promoting itself at black and brown events, as well as providing LGBTQ event support. Can we change the brand to YASSSSCAR!

· JD Vance just publicly asked his Hindu wife to convert to Christianity. Here’s an idea, maybe divorce and find someone a little more “acceptable” for a hillbilly. I hear Erica Kirk is single.

I’mma get right to it. Here are the two things you need to do this week: 1. Vote YES on 50 if you live in California (the temporary redistricting mandate in CA), and 2. Google and then become a GROCERY BUDDY if your city does not have reserves to feeds its families in need. The foregoing is in addition to donating food to food banks (which are not always accessible to working poor families). Optional, but just as important: don’t be a dick with Halloween candy if children Trick-o-Treat in your more safe neighborhood. And if you are reading this and need a grocery buddy yourself, slide into my DMs. I got you. What are you drinking?