By skyforbes 
Day 1: Welcome to the Circus
9:15 AM. I push open the glass door on the 11th floor, buzzing with that “new hire adrenaline.” A giant blue mission statement slaps me in the face: “Inspire Creativity, Enrich Life.” Nearby, a screen loops TikTok cringe compilations. As I wait for my temp badge at reception, a group of Gen-Z’ers breezes past. “Holy crap, that actually works?” one says loudly in Mandarin. Ah, youth. Surrounded by them, even my jaded corporate soul feels 0.5% less fossilized.
Receptionist: “Please open your Feishu (Lark) app to show your e-badge, then scan this QR code for your temp badge, and scan that one for your welcome gift.” I fumble with my phone like a boomer at a self-checkout. Beep. Beep. Beep. Victory.
The Bellevue office is eerily empty — rows of white desks, no partitions, and an AC unit roaring like a 747. It’s giving “startup that spent all its budget on snacks.” My past life at small companies flashes before me. Same “cost-effective” vibe, but hey, maybe they’ll actually give raises here.
Hot Desking: Because Capitalism
No assigned seats — just QR codes to claim a desk like some dystopian lunch reservation. I scan one. Boom. Desk secured. Gotta admire the efficiency, even if it reeks of “how many interns can we fit in a closet?”