By skyforbes 
The System Wasn’t Built for Us
Everything can change in an instant. For you. For me. For us.
All it takes is one unexpected event. For my family, it was one brain surgery, a series of medical setbacks, and suddenly, my husband couldn’t work anymore. I went from stay-at-home mom to sole provider overnight, working six days a week in a restaurant while raising five small children.
His medication cost over $2,000 a month. I did not even make 2,000 dollars per month. We had no health insurance. No safety net. Desperate, I applied for food stamps and Medicaid.
I was denied.
I made too much money, as a waitress! A waitress!
And because I was still married and my husband lived in our home, I didn’t qualify.
The system that was supposed to catch us didn’t just fail — it disappeared.
The Realities of Poverty for Single Mothers
Unmarried mothers are five times more likely to live in poverty than their married counterparts (Tucker & Lowell, 2015). Research consistently shows that single mothers face tougher economic challenges — lower education levels, minimal income, and fewer years of work experience (Bianchi & Milkie, 2010; DeFina, 2008).
But these aren’t just statistics. These are women like Cindy.
I met Cindy during my research. She returned to work just three days after giving birth, barely able to walk, still healing, barely sleeping. But with no paid leave, no help, and rent looming, she had no choice. She already knew she’d miss her son’s first steps, his first smile, and his first spoonful of cereal.
“I just had to accept that someone else would see them instead of me,” she told me.
The Role of Low-Wage Work & Childcare Gaps
Single mothers often have access only to low-wage jobs that come with:
Minimal earnings potential
No flexibility or support systems
Lack of affordable childcare
No access to medical benefits
60% of low-income jobs don’t offer benefits like paid leave or health insurance (National Employment Law Project, 2023).
These challenges don’t just hurt families, they trap them.
The Evolution of Welfare Reform: Myths That Shaped Policy
In 1988, the JOBS Act introduced a shift in the way Americans viewed poverty and public support. Alongside it came the “Welfare Queen” myth, a damaging stereotype suggesting single mothers, particularly Black women, were gaming the system.
The narrative was built on misinformation, but it stuck. It shaped policy and public opinion, and it continues to influence how society treats women in poverty today (Gilens, 1999).
By 1996, when President Clinton signed the welfare reform bill into law, public support for aid had eroded. What began as a system to help families became a system focused on work requirements and time limits, with no regard for reality.
When Help Isn’t Really Help: The Gaps in SNAP & Medicaid
Programs like SNAP and Medicaid were designed as lifelines. But in practice, they often make life harder, not easier.
Nearly 42 million Americans receive SNAP, but 80% of benefits run out before the end of the month (Center on Budget and Policy Priorities, 2023).
Take Danielle, for example.
Danielle had been working two jobs for months, one at a diner, the other cleaning offices. When she finally got a $2 raise, she thought she was making progress. Instead, it triggered a loss of her childcare assistance and food stamps.
“I’m working harder and coming home with less,” she told me. “How is that a reward?”
SNAP’s Future at Risk Under New Budget Proposals
According to TIME (March 29, 2025), the Trump administration’s proposed budget would cut up to $230 billion from USDA programs, including SNAP and shift more responsibility to state budgets.
“It is impossible to do those kinds of cuts without putting about 42 million Americans at risk for food insecurity,” said Rep. April McClain Delany (D-MD).
A 2019 USDA study found that every $1 in SNAP spending generates $1.54 in GDP.
“SNAP helps pay the farmer, employ the truck driver, and keep grocery stores running,” said Salaam Bhatti from the Food Research and Action Center.
This isn’t just about feeding families, it’s about sustaining the economy.
Faith-Based Organizations: Filling the Gaps
Faith-based organizations (FBOs) have stepped in where the government has stepped back, providing food, housing, and support services for families in need.
They’ve grown in prominence since the 1996 welfare reform law, with bipartisan support from Presidents Bush, Obama, and Trump.
These organizations are essential, but they can’t do it all. Should nonprofits and churches carry the burden of broken systems?
What Needs to Change?
Phase out benefits gradually instead of sudden cliffs
Expand Medicaid in all states
Let SNAP cover basics like diapers, hygiene products, and hot food
Call to Action: What Can You Do?
These aren’t just policy issues. They’re real people.
Cindy missed her baby’s milestones.
Danielle was punished for getting a raise.
Many are denied help because they made “too much” in low-income, low-skilled jobs with no benefits.
If this story resonates with you:
- Share this article
- Contact your representatives
- Support local nonprofits and food banks
Want to learn more? Educate yourself on the topics by reading:
- Nickel and Dimed- Barbara Ehrenreich
- Not a Crime to Be Poor- Peter Edelman
- When Helping Hurts- Steve Corbett & Brian Fikkert
Coming Next: How moms navigate full-time work while still living in poverty.