By skyforbes 
I know what you’re thinking: haven’t I written about this before?
And you’re right, I have. You can check it out here for your reference.
Now, what made me dive back into the world of TikTok? I’m glad you asked. After just four months of deleting the app last year, the FOMO kicked in, and it felt like I was missing out on something special. The chronically online TikTok speak, the silly jokes and viral trends: the list goes on. Then I thought about it and tried to see the silver linings. My content always performed well, and the sense of community I found online felt real. Apprehensive of the looming ban, I didn’t see any harm in posting more and growing my audience.
Who knew what was bound to happen to the app.
So, I gave in to temptation and re-downloaded the time-consuming, brain rotting, short form video platform again. Even during my months of inactivity, my page grew over 400 followers. I was genuinely shocked. Two posts in particular gained significant traction, for which I’m grateful, as they contained important messages in which people could relate.
I imagined all 6,684 followers as real audience members, twiddling their thumbs during my brief hiatus, waiting for another viral video. So, I showed up, delivered, and continued to ride the wave of pseudo-fame.
However, as time went on, I noticed an ugly shift in the vibes of TikTok.
I don’t know how to describe it, but the energy is off. The app no longer feels comfortable or fun. It’s more-so a competitive hellscape full of too many people trying to do the same thing, looking like carbon copies of one another, slowly but surely losing their individuality.
I couldn’t help but think: Is it time to delete this thing again?
I made this choice before my trip to Nice two weeks ago. My mind was racing due to over stimulation, causing irritability, moodiness, exhaustion, and downright bitterness. If you’ve met me, you’d know that this isn’t my natural, normal state.
Then it hit me: I had to break the pattern before it broke me. I’m an adult, I can make this decision for myself. Just because everyone else enjoys TikTok doesn’t mean I have to. The moment of deletion felt like immediate relief, a massive weight lifted from my shoulders.
I could finally exhale.
En route to the sunny French Riviera, I found myself feeling more present and aware of my behaviour. Noticing those around me looking relaxed and happy with their environment motivated me to feel the same. There is a whole, real world out there, and in my honest opinion, it doesn’t exist on social media.
Now, I do believe in the power of the internet and how it can bring goodness to this crazy planet. The problem is discerning between what’s real versus what we deem as “real.” Idealising random internet strangers, placing them on imaginary pedestals, and acting like they owe us something feels pretty creepy to me. Maybe I was just on the “wrong” side of TikTok, but I personally don’t care enough to find the “right” side.
Call me a philosopher (or don’t), but how can we be truly human if we aren’t physically connecting? Why have we become so obsessed with an online world that doesn’t even exist? Is this an ironic take considering I’m typing my thoughts on a keyboard for the world to see? Am I countering my own argument? Who knows.
What I do know is that life existed before TikTok. News flash: you don’t need to share every waking moment of your daily life online.
For example, posting small babies and children online without their consent, airing out dirty laundry instead of communicating with our partners, criticising our workplace online and facing serious repercussions: we have become way too comfortable with how much information we share. And as I always say, we need to go back to journaling and keeping things to ourselves.
It’s safe to say all of this was a major breaking point for me, (or maybe it’s because I’m almost 30 years old and my frontal lobe is fully formed), but I genuinely believe in leading a more private life. Not every passion needs to be publicised or monitised. Not every hobby needs to be a side hustle. You don’t need to wake up at 4am and broadcast your phony, ridiculously fabricated morning routine, and you definitely don’t need to “hustle” more.
Life is meant to be beautifully complex and unique to our own path. The constant comparison to everyone else in the world won’t make you feel any better. In the wise words of my former therapist:
“Comparison is poison, so stop poisoning yourself.”
In summary, freeing myself from the shackles of TikTok was one of the best choices I’ve made thus far. I know it’s possible to balance daily life with scrolling through the apps, but I personally don’t see it that way anymore. While I can go on and on about the positive influences I’ve encountered on TikTok to justify its usage, it all boils down to what I deem as relevant and significant.
Traveling, spending quality time with my boyfriend, expanding my social circle, connecting with family, pivoting in my career, and lowering my screen time are the most important factors right now. Without TikTok, I’ve reclaimed my time and feel inspired to write more than ever before. While some may think you “need” social media or a large following to be successful, I’d like to politely, yet firmly disagree.
It’s all about quality over quantity, and I’d rather have an intimate, interactive audience versus bot accounts posing as real people.
Life is about pouring energy into something that brings you joy. Writing has, and always will be, that vice for me. Instead of depleting my attention span while watching brain rot, I can utilise this clear conscious to focus on topics that are near and dear to my heart. On top of that, I can enjoy lovely, beautiful messages like this that push me to show up every single day:
While everyone else may not agree with my decision to walk away from TikTok, their opinions are of no concern to me. This is my life, and I am choosing to live it my way. I don’t know about you, but it feels pretty damn good to take back control over your habits and behaviour.
While I am thankful for the TikTok audience I’ve created throughout the years, I know it’s time for something new. And if that means starting from scratch and connecting with real human beings, so be it. My mental health and attention span are thanking me, and I’m feeling more motivated to sit down, pour my heart out, and share real stories with readers like you.
_
Thank you for showing up and supporting this blog. Your views and readership mean the world, and I’m so excited for whatever comes next.
Let me know if this resonated with you, or if you’d like more posts about this topic. xx